Monday, November 28, 2005

Malaysian Driver

Hi! This is for all u drivers out there! No Offence!

1. One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: IPOH driver

2. One hand on wheel, one hand out the window with cigarette: KEPONG driver.

3. One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: DOWNTOWN KUALA LUMPUR driver

4. One hand on wheel, one hand on parang, foot solidly on accelerator: JOHOR driver.

5. One hand on wheel, one hand on nonfat double decaf cappuccino, cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator, hands-free on the lap: BANGSAR driver.

6. Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: FOREIGNER, driving in MALAYSIA.

7. One hand on 12 oz. Double shot latte, one knee on wheel, talking on cell phone, foot on brake, mind on radio game, banging head on steering wheel while stuck in traffic: SUBANG JAYA DRIVER ... on the Federal Highway!

8. One hand on wheel, one hand on passengers head rest, alternating between both feet being on the accelerator and both feet on brake, throwing rambutans or durian shells out the window: KARAK HIGHWAY ... KUANTAN driver.

9. Four-wheel drive pick-up truck, READY-TO-KILL attitude, rear window stickers read "Make my day", beer cans on floor, wedding ribbon still attached to antenna: CONSTRUCTION SITE ... PUCHONG driver!

10.One hand on the handphone, another hand picking nose, One leg on the dash board, another leg crossed on the seat with a beer can in the middle turning anywhere he likes, parking anywhere he likes, in fact, driving anywhere he likes. Aaahhh ... this is a heaven for drivers ... welcome to PENANG!

11. Two hands gripping tightly to the wheel, eyes glued on the windscreen, alternately stepping on the accelerator and brakes every 5 seconds. WOMAN DRIVER!

12. One hand on wheel, the other hand on the hand brakes, honking and swearing at slow and inexperienced city drivers swerving at every corner all the way up to the mountains, tossing petai and cabbage at the back seat to left and right. CAMERON HIGHLANDS DRIVER!

13. Squeezing and weaving and driving the wrong way on one-way streets and running over garbage bags but still managing to avoid getting honked at or killing anyone (besides the occasional bump on the head!) KANCIL DRIVER!

Heheh... hope u guys enjoyed this..

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