"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse."So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked."No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me,and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,and still be afraid of a spider.
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.An earlier discussion had led to an argument andneither of them wanted to concede their position.As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?""Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can beso stupid and so beautiful all at the same time." The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
THE SILENT TREATMENT
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving eachother the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning businessflight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on apiece of paper,"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper bythe bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
God may have created man before woman,but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.